This is a part of the To Love Many Things series, to read about the origins click here.
Perception is reality.
If that’s true, then whatever I’m perceiving about myself, picking up on from the people around me, fixating on in the world, must be true. If I’m seeing it, then I’m believing it, and it must be true.
But wait. What if my perception is skewed? What if my perception has been altered, or influenced? What if the way in which I perceive the world has been tainted and is no longer pure? Then what? Then what do I do? What is reality? How do I determine the truth from the altered perception?
And really, if my perception is untrue, then my reality must be untrue. If what I’m seeing, observing, taking in, is false, then my reality, my world, my feelings, my everything, must be untrue as well. Right?!
Nope. Wrong. If I’ve learned anything, I’ve learned that my perception doesn’t necessarily inform my reality. I’ve learned that my perception can be horribly skewed. I’ve learned that my perception can lie to me, misguide me, lead me astray. My perception, thanks to past influences, can trick me and convince me that lies are truth and truths are lies. My perception can absolutely create a reality, but that doesn’t mean that that “reality” is true.
Okay. So skewed perception can create false realities. Now what? Now how do I sift through the lies and pull out the truths? How do any of us know what is true, and real, and pure? If perception isn’t reality, then what is?
Reality is experiences. Reality is that gut feeling deep in the pit of your soul. It’s not that nauseating, misguiding, confusing, piece of shit beast of a hovering cloud that is constantly present. That cloud is real, hovering and won’t just fucking rain and go away. But, as real and present as that cloud feels, that cloud is still not reality. That cloud is a skewed perception. That cloud is a past influence. That cloud is hell on earth and feels oh so real, but just like an actual cloud, when you try to catch it and put it away, you only end up smacking yourself in the face. That cloud, as awful as it feels, is just air. That cloud, as miserable as it seems, is also a space to learn, grow, and create. A reality in which human beings are right in front of you. The love, joy, fear, pain, and passion that you feel is real and motivating. Not a skewed perception, but a real life feeling. That cloud doesn’t always have to be oppressive. That cloud can be a place for a forward moving reality.