Dear J is a reoccurring series in the TGS Sunday Letters. Each Dear J letter is written anonymously by one of our writers. These letters are the things we didn’t say, the things we wish we did and the things that we never will.
I was seventeen when you chose her over me. I was seventeen when I realized that putting someone on a pedestal isn’t the way you should live your life. I was seventeen when I realized that the person I should be putting the majority of my faith in should be myself.
It’s taken me almost ten years to be able to say two words. Thank you. Thank you for teaching me that you can’t be everyone’s favorite. You can’t be everyone’s ace. You can’t be everyone’s go to girl. You can’t make everyone happy.
To this day I still don’t know why you chose her and to be honest, I’ll probably never find out. For whatever reason, you decided that she was the One you could rely on. She was the One you could put your trust in. She was the One.
I was no longer the One and I finally realized that’s okay. I don’t have to be your One, I have to be my own.
It’s been almost a decade and I no longer put people on a pedestal in my life. Instead, I have the confidence to see myself at their level. I don’t run around second guessing myself anymore like I did in the years following seventeen. I moved away, put myself in a new environment and thrived.
Thank you for teaching me that I am, and always will be, enough.